Saturday, April 15, 2006

All over the place!

This week's installment is all over the place. A book review,a new column and the regular gossip. The new column is called: "It's so funny because......." Those of you that are Simpsons fans know the answer to the sentence. Heavy on the snark/mean and not for those of the sensitive nature. After reading the column, you may comment and finish the sentence "It's so funny because....” You may NOT comment on why you don’t find it funny (sorry I make up the rules).

It’s been a pretty slow week. No alien cruise baby, no arrests, no more embarrassing pictures of Whitney. But Britney Spears did get a visit from the Child Protective Services this week. Apparently, the baby fell out of a high chair and fractured his skull. This is very serious, so I won’t comment but someone needs to step in on this situation. Momma Spears? Super Nanny? Can someone out there help the little guy? Random: Why did Britney and Justin break-up anyway?His relationship with Cameron is zzzzzzzz. And her relationship with the 'leech' is destructive.

Don't call it a comeback!
Update: After coming off the banishment list, Jennifer Lopez is making some headway in making a full comeback. She has a song out with tranny loving LL, which apparently the kids and radio are loving. I listened to the song over the weekend, and although it’s a hot mess, I could see the hit potential (a nice re-mix would help). I’ve created a chart, so we can all keep track of Jen’s comeback. I’m predicting a full comeback by the end of the year. If Ms. Lopez does anything to help or hinder her progress her chart will reflect such actions. If I miss any moments let me know.

Getting ready for the new album to drop. Janet has traded in the cupcakes for the gym.

On vacation with her man and family. She lost 22 pounds for the movie "Dreamgirls". The word is that she getting too skinny. But I think she looks GREAT! Nicole Richie, take note of how a fit, slim body should look like.

Another view. Why does Jay think that’s proper beach attire? Note to black men: It's okay to look like you're actually at the beach, instead of the basketball court. No one will think you're gay.

"It's so funny because.........."

Last week Jennifer Lopez made it off the banishment list. And since it’s close to Easter, I’m considering taking one more person off the list.

Angelina Jolie may be the next the lucky celebrity. She’s been an A-list actress, who has not made a decent movie in years but always seems to be on every cover of every magazine. Steals Brad Pitt away from America’s sweetheart and walks away without a scratch. How? Why? Do you ask…. it’s not the UN ambassador gig, No Angelina’s teflon is her accessory son Maddox.

I just think he is the cutest accessory kid ever! I see pictures of him in Paris, New York, Namibia, and I just think wow he’s awesome. I’ve had a little day dream were Maddox is my new accessory kid and we hang out at all the hot places, shopping and going to exotic locations. He would help me pick out a new bag for spring, tell me that the new pants I purchased looked great on me and then would pick out a matching shirt. He would fend off those damn paparazzi with his casual cool and funny faces. One particularly vivid part of the day dream is that Maddox and I are in Saint Topez, at the beach and he’s building sand castles and just sipping a glass of wine (I know he’s underage but doesn’t he look like he drinks wine?). And then we hang out at some ultra cool restaurant and since I don’t speak French, little Maddy orders for me. And of course I would never get tired of the mohawk. After a few years of just hanging out we decide to get a new accessory, kid, since I probably need a second opinion on that spring handbag. Maddox loves Africa, so we would probably look to get the new accessory kid (this time a girl) from Africa, although I’ve always been partial to South America. Maddy knows hip, so if he says Africa, it’s Africa! Plus I’ve read that South American accessories kids are so five years ago.
I have to find out where Angelina got the little accessory guy. I may have to stop day dreaming and get one myself. But with my luck I’ll get one that looks bad in a mohawk and can’t tell the
difference between a Gucci original and knockoff.

Cuter than any handbag. Louis eat your heart out!

Why is Brad trying to copy Maddox?

Who do you think would win in a fight between these two?

Keeping with Kimora it seems that she has been spending time with basketball loser Stephon Marbury.


That's all I have this week. Happy Easter!


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